A heart to heart in the Knicks' locker room

According to ESPN.com, Larry Brown and Stephon Marbury met yesterday to end their feuding ways. Quotes from the two men after the alleged kiss-and-make-up session:

Larry Brown: "I want to coach him and I want to make him better and I don't want him to have to go through what he's gone through. I really was proud of the way he acted."

Starbury: "He told me to play the way he wants me to play and if I don't feel like it's the right way just bear with it. And I didn't say yes and I didn't say no."

Ding, ding ding! Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner. Congratulations to Stephon Marbury for being the first player to ever go toe-to-toe with Brown and win. The toughest challenger previous to Marbury was the other great American ballhog, Allen Iverson, but those bouts were draws at best for AI. To me, the ESPN.com article reads like something verrrrry unpleasant to/for Brown went down behind closed doors, forcing him to back-peddle. I wonder what that conversation could have looked like…

[insert Wayne’s World sound effects]

Brown: Thanks for coming, Stephon. Whacking each other in the press isn’t doing any good, so let’s clear the air and get a few things straight.

Marbury: [grabs crotch] I got something you can get straight, coach.

Brown: Please. You know what we used to do to punks like you when I was playing?

Marbury: Touch-foul ‘em while they blew by your slow ass to the cup?

Brown: [grabs Marbury by the silk collar] Don’t think that just because you were almost as hot as Sebastian Telfair growing up around here that you stand a chance against me. [shoves championship ring in Marbury’s face] The only currency that matters in this town is rings, and last I checked, you’re flat broke. So before you say one more word, just ask yourself, if things get real ugly between us, who’s got the juice?

Marbury: Your momma’s got my juice, coach.

Brown: I ordered Isiah to get me another point guard just to show you how expendable you are. I had to write it big and in crayon, and then I had to read it to him, then draw some pictures for him, but eventually he got it. Sure, all he could find was Francis, but I think the message was clear: between me and you, ownership’s backing me. So take the attitude down a notch or five. Otherwise, I’ll make sure you have a nice long career in the middle of nowhere.

Marbury: [yawns] You think I care where I get my thirteen and half million duckets, gramps?

Brown: [dials cell phone] Isiah, it’s me. …No, not daddy. It’s Larry. …Fine, you can call me daddy. Anyway, it’s time to trade Marbury. I’ve had it. He’s through. …Uh-huh. …No, I don’t think you can trade him to the Chinese. I think you have to trade him to another team in the NBA. …Yeah. …I don’t think Reggie’s playing anymore, Isiah. You’d have to try and get a guy who’s actually on their roster. …Croshere will be fine. Sure. …Okay, have a good nap. [hangs up, turns to Marbury] I hope you like the cornfields, kid. You’re outta here.

Marbury: I don’t think so.

Brown: Call Isiah and ask him yourself.

Marbury: That’s not what I mean. [pulls a photo out of his jacket pocket and slides it across the table]

Brown: [goes white] I… see. Well, then. See you on the court.

[insert Wayne’s World sound effects]

I wouldn’t presume to know what would be in such a photo, but it would have to be of Marv-Albertian proportions for him to pull a 180 like this. Feel free to speculate in the comments…